Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Going on a date after 40s...

hey all,

I will try to describe what happens behind the scenes when a simple invitation takes place and you are over 40 years old.

Boy meets girl. Girl is getting anxiety attacks.

You wait for the phone call , sleep with your blackberry and start dieting.

He finally calls you and instead of being exited panic sets in:

What should I wear? What should I say?Do I have enough time to get ready?
I have not been in a real date since I do not rememember when...
Should I Google : ?

Elizabeth Taylor on her glory days if she was felling fat or not too pretty used to postpone the date for a month so she could get ready...She could afford that after all she is Elizabeth Taylor and I am not! If I postponed he might never call again.

Anyway my heart is going miles an hour and I start to make appointments :
Manicure for sure,pedicure not so sure (maybe I will wear my new boots) maybe I should in case I have to take my shoes off, very confused at this point.
I check my phone again ( afraid he might cancel).

Oh God !!!

Wax : check (regular,Brazilian or bold).

Blow dry hair : check

Assassin shoe: check

Dilema: be confortable or look good?
Sexy or classy?
Beacon Hill or Upper East side?
I have a fever...

After that I tell my boss I have a doctors appointment so I can go shopping and buy a new dress in a hour.

Of course I can't find anything , I start to cry and feeling even fatter.

Do I have time for a mini face lift?

Do I have time for a mini lipo?

I guess not so I decided to embrace my wrinkles and cellulite.

At this point I am only drinking water and about to pass out.

OK I am desperately trying to keep my cool and already established that I will get some nice lingerie black lace and classy (just in case).

I get home and call my best friend because I am not sure if I have a glass of wine or take my double dose of meds.

He says I will be fine, just be myself and wear that black dress from last year.

I take both and tried the dress on just to make sure it fits.

After 2 hours and $200.00 later I look good, feel confident and my hair looks amazing.
At this point I am sweating and check if my deodorant is working.
I scribble my name with is last name and of course I love the sound of it.
He is on time (I am in total state of dismal).
He finally arrives and thank God he says I look good and smell good (my mind tells me he wants to get into my lacy panties and I have too much perfume).
I hold on , exhale and promise myself not tonight.
The night goes on , I don't talk too much, behave like a lady but the wine is making me silly.
He drives me home, gives me a good night kiss.
I come home and sing along with my dog and wait for the next phone call.
He is told by his friends he needs to wait a few days.
He does not follow " the rules" which makes my life easier.
Indeed he calls, indeed I will need a new dress.
He is been calling for over a month now, however I do not need my meds and only drink wine to celebrate this new amazing "frince".
I want to be after all happily ever after on this mature fairy tale.

Have faith, believe and be happy.



Anonymous said...

no matter what age we deserve to be happy!!!!!

Brianna Michelle said...

I LOVED this one!!!!! You are really good at this kind of comedy, girl!

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